Today, small girl, I miss you 

Dear Small Girl,

Today is a daddy day for you. Nothing unusual in that. You’ve split your time between the pair of us since you were teeny tiny, you don’t know any other way. So you’ve been  at your lovely daddy’s past couple days.

Usually when you’re there, the elder 3 and I take advantage and do all the things that we can’t do when you’re here.

We binge watch How I Met Your Mother instead of The Next Step.

We have curry for tea as you don’t like spicy foods.

We’ll play the Pointless board game instead of Frustration.

It’s not that we’re glad to see the back of you or anything like that. It’s just that you’ve been spending some of your time at daddy’s house forever so it’s become a routine we all slip into.

Today is a bit different though.

Today I miss you.

How silly is that? ? (very I know!) You’re at school as I write this so I’d not have the pleasure of your company regardless.

Today though, I miss that I don’t get to be the one that picks up your smiley little face up from school.

That I don’t get to tut and say how you must think I’m an octopus as you load me up with PE bags and book bags and the fleece you end up taking off everyday.

I miss that we don’t get to hold hands on our walk down to the train station chatting about our days.

I read earlier that to celebrate Winnie the Pooh’s 90th birthday he’s getting a new friend. Guess who it is going to be? A PENGUIN!! Your most favourite animal, the one you wrote me a book about such is your encyclopaedic knowledge on them! ! As soon as I read that  I just wanted to tell you all about it! I miss that I can’t.

I miss that I’m not bedtime story person tonight, that I’ll not get the call 5 minutes after I’ve turned out your light to ask “fancy a cuddle?”

I just miss you today.

I know I’ve probably not even entered your head today (and that’s ok I don’t want you missing me) You’ve been busy at school then going back to daddy’s house for a yummy dinner. You always tell me his cooking is superior! (“he uses nutmeg in the mash mummy, it gives it taste”) You’ll snuggle on the sofa with him and watch some cooking show then he’ll read you Paddington before bed.

Dividing your time between us works for you. You’re a happy, content, confident little girl. It’s only me that gets daft from time to time. I’m sure daddy feels the same when you’re here.

So here’s to tomorrow.
I can’t wait to open the car door and have you bound out full of tales of your time away.

I look forward to starting on the tortoise costume you so desperately want to make for dressing up day at school.

I can’t wait for us to have our secret special tea we have when the elder ones are at their grandparents.

I can’t wait to carry on reading Harry Potter together.

I’ll tell you the penguin news tomorrow small girl. I’ll read your bedtime story tomorrow.

Just now, for today though,  I miss you

Love Mummy xxx

My Facebook page is here if you like my witterings


17 thoughts on “Today, small girl, I miss you 

  1. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to have shared custody, nor do I know your situation, but from the way you describe it here and talk about her Daddy, I can say with utmost confidence that I don’t need to know you to know that you are doing a damn fantastic job at shared parenting. By talking so amicably about her Daddy you are setting your little girl an absolutely fantastic example. Good job, we need more parents like you in the world xx #fortheloveofblog

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is beautiful. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to have to share custody of a child but it sounds like you have worked things out for the best and your little girl is doing amazing..and so are you! I don’t blame you for missing her, I miss my boy when he’s at play school. Thanks for linking up to #BlogCrush xx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh it must be so hard having to share your little girl and not have her with you all the time. It sounds like you’re doing a great job, though, because she is happy and confident. I think it’s normal to miss her, and it can be funny how some days it seems harder than others. But I hope you had an extra special mummy-daughter time on her return! #blogcrush

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I know how you feel – in a different way. It’s funny how this wave of emotion just engulfs you out of no-where, even though this is something that’s been ‘the norm’ since ever. I love the fact you’re amicable with her dad like that, it makes me sad when one parent belittles the other in front of their kids. x

    Liked by 1 person

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