My little blog has been just that for a good couple of years now. MY little thing. My tiny corner of the internet where I could dump my meandering thoughts from my head onto the screen. I find it really quite therapeutic and there are times in the height of an anxious period that it’s saved my sanity. What began as documenting life after abuse , showing that there really is a bright sparkly light at the end of the domestic abuse tunnel evolved into my wittering about parenting and kids and my (non existent) love life. It’s very me to veer off on a tangent.
Whilst only people I didn’t know were reading , it was perfectly safe. People , strangers, were so kind and encouraging and it buoyed me up and allowed my confidence to grow a little. People seemed to identify with what I’d been through , words like inspiring an courageous were used …about me??Very strange! Women got in touch to say how they felt reassured that life after domestic abuse really was possible. If I can ever have helped anyone feel a bit better or reassured then bloody hell that’s just the best thing.
Showing my scribblings to people I actually know though??Hmmm. I’d spent months umming and ahhing about it, felt risky.
My little blog is just my silly thoughts , it’s not the stuff of genius. I’ve really grown fond of my little space though.
The problem was The Voice , the one I spoke about here .Saying that everyone would laugh at me , that everyone would think I was stupid. That my writing would be pulled to pieces and I’d end up dumping the blog and stop boring people with my nonsense.
No one has though.
People have continued to be kind and encouraging. Yay!!
It makes me want to test myself in other ways. How many things do I not do because I’m scared of looking like an idiot? How many other things do I not even attempt because one person years ago told me I was rubbish at everything? How often do I stop myself trying something new , telling myself I’m not good enough before anyone else gets the chance to?
I do it all the time.
I’d never let the kids behave this way , we have a ‘dream huge’ policy in our house and maybe I need to join in!
So thank you so much for your kind words and maybe my little blog can help me be a bit braver, push myself little further and be less of a scaredy cat. Got to be worth a shot at least.