I showed my blog to real life people…and the world didn’t implode!

My little blog has been just that for  a good couple of years now. MY little thing. My tiny corner of the internet where I could dump my meandering thoughts from my head onto the  screen. I find it really quite therapeutic and there are times in the height of an anxious period that it’s saved my sanity. What began as documenting life after abuse , showing that there really is a bright sparkly light at the end of the domestic abuse tunnel evolved into my wittering about parenting and kids and my (non existent) love life. It’s very me to veer off on a tangent.

Whilst only people I didn’t know were reading , it was perfectly safe. People , strangers, were so kind and encouraging and it buoyed me up and allowed my confidence to grow a little. People seemed to identify with what I’d been through , words like inspiring an courageous were used …about me??Very strange! Women got in touch to say how they felt reassured that life after domestic abuse really was possible. If I can ever have helped anyone feel a bit better or reassured then bloody hell that’s just the best thing.

Showing my scribblings to people I actually know though??Hmmm. I’d spent months umming and ahhing about it, felt risky.

My little blog is just my silly thoughts , it’s not the stuff of genius. I’ve really grown fond of my little space though.

The problem was The Voice , the one I spoke about here .Saying that everyone would laugh at me , that everyone would think I was stupid. That my writing would be pulled to pieces and I’d end up dumping the blog and stop boring people with my nonsense.

No one has though.

People have continued to be kind and encouraging. Yay!!

It makes me want to test myself in other ways. How many things do I not do because I’m scared of looking like an idiot? How many other things do I not even attempt because one person years ago told me I was rubbish at everything? How often do I stop myself  trying something new , telling myself I’m not good enough before anyone else gets the chance to?

I do it all the time.

I’d never let the kids behave this way , we have a ‘dream huge’ policy in our house and maybe I need to join in!

So thank you so much for your kind words and maybe my little blog can help me  be a bit braver, push myself little further and be less of a scaredy cat. Got to be worth a shot at least.

 

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8 thoughts on “I showed my blog to real life people…and the world didn’t implode!

  1. Interesting. I have flip-flopped with either attaching my blog to “me” on the internet, or quietly writing away from the gaze of people I know in the “real world”. There are a few that know I write a blog, but not many.

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  2. I did. I was nervous that my abusive ex would see it but I was like “hey it is my life and it happened to me if you don’t like it then you shouldn’t have abused me!” Blogging has been healing for me.

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  3. I’m one year from leaving an abusive relationship – I’ve hesitated to connect my blog with my actual identity. Partly, I know my abuser would love that kind of access to me. Mostly, however, I’m not sure the people in my life are prepared for the things I’ve shared. Maybe someday. 🙂 It’s nice to know others have done it and the sky hasn’t fallen!

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    1. I must admit I did remove a lot of the really raw stuff before I shared with people who love me for that reason too, they don’t need to read that stuff x

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  4. I totally get this. Very few people in real life know about my blog. Mainly because I write such personal stuff I can’t imagine everyone knowing that about me. Though another friend always says the truth sets you free so I hope one day I have the courage. Well done you!

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    1. I dithered about it for ages but everyone has been so lovely, I’m glad it was a secret at the start though or I’d never have been able to write so honestly. I did take some of the really raw stuff out before ‘going public’ though as like you say I didn’t feel right people knowing everything!! X

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